62 Comments
Sep 22, 2023·edited Sep 22, 2023Liked by lyz

These people are aware that even before the 20th century, there were Senators who assaulted other Senators with canes and fireplace tongs, right? Seriously, spare us the rant about this country once being respectful. Anyone with a passing knowledge of slavery, lynching, and/or Jim Crow could tell you that’s a load of crap.

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That is history that denigrates the lofty title of "senator," so those books have been expunged from the curriculum. Senators have always behaved with decorum. It wasn't until the dress code rules were rewritten to allow bare arms that things started downhill. The lusty thoughts looking at women's biceps just ... shudder!

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The moment when people started watching C-Span for the fan service (Clutches pearls with a death grip in the background)

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And let's remember that "founding fathers" often hated each other and defamed and libeled each other all the damned time.

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Based off that photo it looks like David Brooks removed all the vegetables from the burger, meaning he's probably not getting any fibre in his diet. No wonder he's full of shit...

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author

Hahahahhaha

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It brings me joy that this made you laugh. So nice to reciprocate that. Dingus of the Week is always good but this one? *chef's kiss*

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*dead*

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“Not that democracy and ethics have actually been the norm in American politics, but we do like to pretend, don’t we? And before you try to come here and tell me “We used to be a proper country” ma’am, we used to legally enslave people and we codified that into our laws.”

I LOVE your writing. Like, best money I’ve spent all year. Don’t tell the others, though. It’ll be our secret.

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I never go on Twitter anymore, so thank you for sharing Joyce Carol

Oates, that was perfection.

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“For too long dress codes have been used as a cudgel and unfairly welded against women and people of color and it’s long past time that the United States Senate take a stand and model to the country what fairness and inclusion looks like. After all, who cares how well we dress as long as we are doing our job of making this country run,” said Sen. Joe Manchin of West Virginia.

I read this and thought, “Wow, maybe he isn’t 100% terrible!” Silly me for even thinking this was possible even in pre-caffeine state...

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Joe Manchin in the comic book antimatter universe be like:

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Right? I was like, “REALLY?!?!”

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Sep 22, 2023Liked by lyz

I could buy the argumemt that Congress is there to do the People's Business and a more formal dress code symbolizes that they Take It Seriously if it wasn't for the fact that their actions show they do little and take even less seriously. So I actually think they should have to be in clown makeup on the floor.

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author

this is a great idea!

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This dingus really has everything, Lyz. I'm cackling in my kitchen. And I'm so excited for you (and us!) about your book.

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I keep imagining Stefan from SNL going into detail into what it has because it’s that good

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Sep 22, 2023Liked by lyz

Shorts?! In the Senate?!!! Where are my pearls, I need to clutch them for a third week in a row. Really getting my money's worth out of those shiny little baubles, I tell you. I may need to upgrade to dramatically swooning onto an ornate couch, although I have cats who have no respect for my living room furniture. One of them is a little chaos gremlin who likes to hang upside down from a footrest like a tiny deranged sloth.

I've already pre-ordered This American Ex-Wife as an ebook because I do not have enough room in my house for all the books I want, and I just put a reminder on my calendar for the release date so I can read it immediately. I'm stoked af. Lyz if you ever have an author event or something in Madison or Milwaukee, WI, I hope you mention it in advance on this newsletter because I would definitely go. Unless there's a dress code that forbids shorts.

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NGL, at this point I’m surprised your pearls aren’t crushed into a fine powder.

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Wait, David Brooks is only 61 and has been pulling this schtick since he was in his 30's?!? I assumed he was at least 10 years older.

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It is really depressing to realize how close I’m age I am to him. Like, how do you grow up in the 70s and turn out to be such a turd? Oh wait...

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At the very least, you'd expect him to be a conservative turd but not start the grumpy grandpa act until he was at least 70.

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He's a year YOUNGER than I am!! Theoretically, I could have gone to high school with him. Yikes!!

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You can just make David Brooks a Dingus emeritus. And this is another form of racism. Dress like a white guy from 1948 or else!

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Lyz, I just want to tell you as a profound admirer of snark, the dress code post is .... mwah. On another level. I want to bathe in it, and then dab it behind each ear before going out on Saturday night. It fills my heart with joy. Thank you from the bottom of my snarky heart.

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Maybe they should show they respect the position by...respecting the position? Like, believing in government, funding it, and making it more functional, not less?

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What a novel concept!?!?!

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What a great column! Joyce Carol Oates, suddenly I miss twitter. I think those are Fetterman’s dress shorts to be fair. I was really happy to hear him in an interview sounding very well, very articulate, his processing difficulties may be behind him. I just love him.

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John Fetterman is the senator we need right now. I loved his response to hearing there would be impeachment proceedings. That's exactly how seriously we should take them. I like his wife even more, and I am a big fan of the Levi, Artie, and Potato twitter feed.

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So you'll have seen his comebacks to DeSantis and Nate Silver?

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Yesss. And his framing of Boebert's antics.

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Didn't Krysten Sinema already kill the senate dress code?

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I thought it was MTG cosplaying Cruella De Ville during the State of the Union

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Money does not buy taste, that's for sure.

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Good one!

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Sep 22, 2023Liked by lyz

A colleague of mine, who was a neighbor of the Manchin family in West Virginia, tells of seeing Joe out cutting grass shirtless while wearing gold chains well after he had gone to seed. Truly a man of the people.

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