Mug shots shots shots shots shots shots
“Ramaswamy at one point said the government was paying women to not live with men.”
Where’s my money? What’s the process for getting it? 😁
I would pay money to sit in a room and watch you and Alexandra Petri riff off of each other for a couple of hours. Since I still have my two front teeth, this is all I want for Christmas.
Freaky little drinks are absolutely necessary throughout the year. My current libations of choice are iced mint-chocolate tea and chinotto-flavored Italian soda. And I am lol'ing that someone dm'd you to complain about your "conspicuous consumption."
The RNC loyalty pledge basically summed it all up. All of the other candidates signed it, asserting that they will support the eventual Republican nominee, whomever it is. Trump, of course, did not sign it. So this debate featured a bunch of people who have ALREADY PLEDGED THEIR LOYALTY TO TRUMP, who is the overwhelming polls leader. Why *would* he show up?
I tried to watch the "debate" - and can we just now always use scare quotes when describing presidential debates? Anyway - I had it on for maybe one minute and realized my time was too valuable. I proceeded to watch Suits instead.
And thank you for the grandma video. I lived with my grandma for the last three years of her life. I was 30-33, and she was 93-96. It was probably one of my best decisions.
Republicans at last night’s debate: Please make us relevant again, monkey’s paw!
Monkey’s paw: I’m about to end these men’s (and woman’s) whole careers.
Frankly, Lyz, whatever you were drinking when you wrote this column was The Elixir of Bitter Bitch Rage and where can I find it in gallon jugs?
PS Adding Welcome to Atlanta … absolute perfection!
I want you to know I read "Mug shots shots shots shots shots shots" in my head to the rhythm of Duran Duran's "The Reflex," as in, "The Reflex fle fle fle fle flex..."
Omg the grandma video made me human again after reading about the insanity of the debate...the worst moment of the debate was that one guy saying that all refugees crossing our border should be ‘stone cold dead’ - I mean they are not even hiding their fascist death agenda anymore! (How they reconcile that statement with being pro-life I do not know!) 🥴😣
Lyz, would you help me out with something?
DeSantis keeps saying something about Biden and his basement. What is that a reference to? I know they showed Biden in the mayor of Coralville's basement doing a rally prior to the 2020 caucuses. But that's the only basement reference I know of. What are they talking about?
I loved this whole newsletter so much. I personally thought Mike Pence looked as if he was made of wax or maybe bland cheese but your description was perfect. Thanks for making my Friday!
You know who else was a dingus this week? people who bought tickets to Fyre Festival II
Spectacular. You make Fridays worth living!
I mean, I think Pence is a serious person. He’s completely delusional, as proven by the fact that he’s running for president at all, but he doesn’t seem like he’s trying gain the same notoriety as Desantis. I mean, all he’s getting now are projectile rotten tomatoes and the occasional MAGA lynch mob.
Just popping in to say I voted for Fani Willis and I’ve been in such a self-congratulatory state since the indictments, you’d think I was carrying the entire American justice system on my back
Meanwhile during Tucker and Trumper’s little “interview” they talked about Biden’s legs.