Men Yell at Me

Men Yell at Me

Links

Nowhere is safe

And other links for your Sunday

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lyz
Sep 28, 2025
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On Sunday, I write an essay and then offer up a buffet of internet reads curated by me and my assistant editor, Isabella.

These are paywalled because, well, this newsletter is a full-time job. And your money creates jobs for me and Isabella jobs in a state where there aren’t many jobs in the media. It also helps us be independent in a time when independent voices are being silenced.

Today, I am not paywalling the essay. Please read, and subscribe if you can.


I saw it like so many other people, on a video on my phone. I was on Instagram and a friend had reposted a video of Jorge Gonzalez, an employee of the Bread Garden in Iowa City, being thrown to the ground and arrested by two men, identified in the video as ICE agents.

The Bread Garden is a Whole Foods-like market located on the pedestrian mall. The Bread Garden is a central hub for the small college town. At any moment of any day, the patio is occupied by students doing homework or professors eating sandwiches and flipping through pages of books. Across the mall is a playground, newly redone with rubber padding and colorful climbing equipment.

Gonzalez is an immigrant whose son is an American citizen. He came to Iowa earlier this year to join his partner, to start a family, and to begin a new life. He reported regularly to ICE and was being monitored with an ankle bracelet. If they wanted to detain him, they knew where he lived. They knew how to find him and bring him in without violence or intimidation.

Instead, plainclothes officers, who did not identify themselves, went into the crowded market right at the beginning of the lunch rush, attacked Gonzalez, threw him to the ground, and arrested him.

My son saw the video and said, “Isn’t that illegal?” Yes, I said, but no one can enforce the laws when it’s the police breaking them. That night, during their nightly phone call, I overheard my kids’ dad tell my son that Gonzalez must be a bad guy, must have done something bad.

I didn’t shout, “Whatever helps you sleep at night, asshole.” But I wanted to. Maybe I will next time. There seem to be no rules to the cruelty; maybe there should be no more rules to my civility.

Iowa City is sometimes, jokingly or not so jokingly, referred to as the People’s Republic of Johnson County. It’s one of the only safe Democratic strongholds in a state that still wants to believe it’s purple, but is in fact, deeply, deeply red. I have friends who talk about how they want to move somewhere better, somewhere bluer, somewhere safer.

Gonzalez isn’t the first person arrested without cause in the middle of the day, by men not in uniform. He won’t be the last. And this is happening in places that didn’t vote for Trump, that protested him, that held and hold demonstrations and rallies.

Johnson County, where Iowa City is located, is where Jon Green, the county supervisor, defied the governor’s orders and refused to fly the flag at half-staff for Charlie Kirk. In defense of Green’s stance, another supervisor, Mandi Remington, stated, “Johnson county is home to a diverse community, including many who were the direct targets of Kirk’s rhetoric. To honor him with our flags would be to dismiss the harm he caused to our neighbors and constituents.”

“Supervisor Green’s stance affirms that our county will not elevate voices that work to strip others of dignity, freedom, and belonging. I believe this decision is a principled one, rooted in respect for the people of Johnson county and the constitutional values we are sworn to protect.”

Nowhere is safe.

That’s the point of these public arrests. They’re a show of force. A statement that is supposed to make us afraid.

These aren’t just arrests; they are disappearings by an authoritarian and secret police that answers to no one except the whims of an increasingly vindictive president who is going after his political opponents, weaponizing our government against us.

On Friday, I went to a protest against ICE and I heard Gonzalez’s partner speak about the violence of losing him, of what it means to have someone you love to just be taken away in the middle of the day with no answers, no recourse. The unknowing of it. The confusion. The understanding that this is the government, and there is no one to appeal to. No higher authority. There is only us. Us to stand up to this.

After the rally I spoke with the lawmakers in attendance, some of whom want to plan trainings so people can interfere with ICE next time. So they can, if not stop them, stand up to them. And I spoke with other politicians who talked about the harassment they’re receiving for even speaking out against it. Not just online, either; they’re the targets of vitriol from their neighbors, who might come up to a politician’s mother at church and tell her to get her kid to shut up. Somehow worse are the people who encourage moderation, the ones who are supposed to be the leaders, who say, “It’s not that bad. Just be civil. Just be polite.”

After the protest, I walked to get lunch with a friend, and her phone pinged. There had been another arrest, Ian Roberts, the superintendent of the Des Moines Public Schools, who was born in Guyana and grew up in Brooklyn. He was also an Olympic athlete.

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