Dingus of the Week: Jordan B. Peterson
Ironic! Man insults a woman, then feels insulted by women
We made it to another Friday. And that means, it’s time for another dingus. The weekly dingus is the Friday newsletter where I make fun of someone or something in the news, share a drink recipe, and links. If you love your weekly dingus, consider becoming a paid subscriber. I’m running a sale through Wednesday.
This week, the University of Toronto psychology professor, who is mostly famous for hating food and women, Jordan B. Peterson took to Twitter to criticize Sports Illustrated for putting a plus-sized model, Yumi Nu, on its cover. In a now deleted tweet, Jordan Peterson posted a picture of the cover and wrote, “Sorry. Not beautiful. And no amount of authoritarian tolerance is going to change that.”
Which is fair because as we all know, Jordan B. Peterson is the gatekeeper of attractiveness in American society. Every day of my life, I wake up and ask myself, Will Jordan B. Peterson like that I’m wearing the same shirt, leggings, and mom bun as yesterday? Will he approve of my unshaved legs? Or the fact that there is a stain on my pants from dinner two days ago? Jordan, am I PRETTY? JORDAN, PLEASE ANSWER ME.
But alas, he cannot because he flounced off Twitter after enough people mocked his tweet. As he left, the man, who had just insulted a woman online, wrote that “The endless flood of vicious insult is really not something that can be experienced anywhere else.”
So now that he’s gone, who will tell us women if we are attractive? How will we know? Every time I look in the mirror, I think, “What man can judge me for me?” Since Peterson left Twitter, I’ve been running through the streets of my city, curling iron in hand, the cord trailing behind me. I grab men walking by and say, “PLEASE, SIR! WILL YOU LET ME KNOW IF I AM ATTRACTIVE! I MUST KNOW!” I am bereft. Purposeless. I will never know true happiness unless I can appease the gaze of Jordan B. Peterson.
In all seriousness, it will never stop being a surprise to men that women simply do not want your opinion about us. It doesn’t matter what you think of a beautiful woman. If you are attracted to her or not attracted to her, no one cares.
I realize this is how Facebook was invented. But concern trolling a woman over her body simply helps no one, and the only message it conveys is that you are an awful person.
Listen, I’m going to tell you something important. Women don’t dress to impress men. We dress for the job we want: which is feral crone, hiding in the woods with her pets.
What I Am Reading:
The Biden administration created a disinformation board, and when it was attacked with disinformation, they didn’t do anything about it. And the woman they hired to fight disinformation was not allowed to fight the disinformation that was targeted at her.
Scaachi Koul had this great profile of John Waters.
Pro-life Republicans voted against giving babies formula in the middle of a formula crisis.
I don’t know if you’ve been watching the media coverage of the Heard/Depp trial. But it’s pretty awful.
Ruth Graham was on Fresh Air talking about the new divide between pew and pulpit, involving masks and vaccines. I wrote a lot about the divide between the pew and the pulpit for God Land, but the issues were very different then. I always love Ruth’s journalism. She’s a good one.
This made me laugh so stupidly hard.
This week, I launched a Discord server, which is basically a giant chat room where we can all go fight about cheese curds. If you haven’t joined in on the fun, and you want to, the server is for paying members only, and I’m offering 20 percent off a yearly subscription.
So far, it’s been very fun. And so far, there are 378 people over there and I think the thing we’ve talked about the most is cheese. Also, in the server, Beau found the national bird of this newsletter via Effing Birds.
On Wednesday morning, a couple in Cedar Rapids lost their house in a fire. My friend Molly organized a GoFundMe for them. If you are feeling a little hopeless and want to do one good thing, that’s something you can do.